The longing at the center of our hearts is desire. Put there by God. It’s a longing to love, be loved and valued by others and by God. “For where your treasure is, there your heart will be also” (Matthew 6:21). Most of my past life has been built around the idea that my worth … More What Do We Really NEED?
My heart is a mysterious island with high walls to keep you out. There’s no beach where you can land. I’ve even posted a few “No Trespassing” signs. Because I’m terrified of intimacy. I’m afraid you will judge and criticize me. Maybe use my honesty against me, or you might reject me, causing even greater … More Let Go of Your Ego-Protection
We landed in a field outside the car. It happened so fast. Everything spinning. Then the grinding noise became a thud. Smoke rising in the distance. And I remember feeling grief—strangely enough. I knew my parents would be devastated if I died. I couldn’t die, but I feared I would. Soon the grief turned to … More My Scrape with Death
Even after 20 years of being in recovery, I still can feel hopeless and anxious. Not too long ago I was in a dark night of the soul, as we all have from time to time. I felt like I was losing my peace of mind, my sobriety, my physical health, my integrity, my character, … More Anxiety Exists in the Vacuum of Hopelessness
Over the last few years I have settled into a place of shame. I compare myself to others. What am I supposed to be? What am I expected to be? I despise myself for not having more success and for not having a greater impact on my community. This leads me to feelings of guilt … More The Zacchaeus Trap
Over the last few years, I have reread Dietrich Bonhoeffer’s biography by Eric Metaxas several times, captivated by Bonhoeffer’s relentless hope in the most perilous of times. He was a well-known German pastor, theologian, and vocal opponent to the Nazi dictatorship in WWII, eventually executed by the Nazis for his outspoken faith and political activism, … More In Pursuit of Peace
You cannot give away what you do not have. The majority of my life what I thought was love was actually dependency, needing a person to give me what I thought I needed, instead of getting it from God. I was not loving others, but needing them. When God is the central source of my … More A Motive to Love.